Follow Up to the Investigator at My Door

After the 'traumatic incident' I called the office two times, but it's an automated number. I was on hold longer than I had time for and had to hang up. Then I called my husband--he called the number on the investigator's business card she left with me. He had to leave a message, offering to provide whatever proof they needed that he does not live here. He never received a call back.

The next day...I felt afraid to open my curtains. I ignored it and called the office three times. There was an automated message stating there was an unusually high volume of calls and all lines were busy, to hang up and try again later, then it automatically hung up on me. The following Monday, I called the automated service number again, was on hold for a little while until a general eligibility worker took my call. He really didn't have any answers for me and wrote up a message for the caseworker assigned to my case to call me back. She returned my call the very next day. She was vague and evasive.

"Is it proper procedure and protocol for someone to come to my home and demand to be let in, and then threaten me that my benefits will be stopped immediately and I will be sued if I don't let them in my home?"

"Well, if you don't comply, yes."

"So I don't have a right to privacy? She didn't have a warrant."

"But you didn't let her in."

"So are my benefits cut off right now?"

"If you don't comply they will be."

"But she threatened me and said they would be right then and there if I didn't let her in."

"But you didn't let her in."

"Are my benefits stopped then?"

"Well, if you don't show up to the interview and provide the requested documentation."

"But they aren't stopped right now?"

"Well, if you don't comply..."

"So she was lying? Is that how things are normally handled? Investigators come to the door, lie, threaten and try to intimidate people?"

We went around in circles as the case worker would never directly answer my questions. She let me know that I would receive an appointment notice in the mail, listing all the documentation I would need to bring with me to this 'interview'. She also told me I could speak to the investigator's supervisor if I wanted...and that she wasn't familiar with the fraud department's procedures. (funny, the general eligibility I spoke with initially said the same exact thing!)

I received the notice last Wednesday for my appointment this Wednesday, April 16 at 9:00 am--the day before my birthday. My heart dropped. This is real.

I AM BEING INVESTIGATED FOR WELFARE FRAUD.

The notice stated my husband must attend this appointment with me. I am sure his employer is going to love that. This is the list of documentation I am required to bring with me:

pay stubs for all employment
rent receipts
letter from Landlord (w/ Landlord's name & #)
school enrollment for ALL KIDS
statement from persons(s) who gave you loans or contributions
receipts from Child Support
utility bills
bank records from all accounts
automobile registration for all vehicles
Income tax statements
Income Tax from the past 2 years

This is serious. If I think about it too much I feel debilitated. It feels scary. I feel afraid at times. During the conversation with the case worker she implied that the investigator would not return to my home because it was 'unsafe' because I was "yelling" at her? That isn't true. Not at all. My kids were here--I wouldn't yell at someone on my porch with my kids here unless I or we were in serious physical danger!

That's the thing though. People can and will lie. That's what makes a situation like this feel so hopeless and helpless. It doesn't matter what the truth is, it only matters what they want to believe it is. Innocent people get charged and accused.

I want to run away. Or move away at least. Mexico is seriously sounding awesome right now...or the rapture--the rapture sounds even better. I can't run away though. This is something I must face on my own. No one can go through this FOR me. Like pregnancy and labor--there's no turning back and it's all going to happen--I can't stop it. Blaming anyone else won't help either. I refuse to even go down that path right now.

My heart is believing all will be well. My mind is recalling the stories I've heard of innocent people being jailed or penalized or sued.

I can't tell sometimes if I am under reacting or over reacting. I felt paralyzed and overwhelmed when I opened the appointment notice. I couldn't think straight. I don't know what I was supposed to do next. So I just sat there and cried and prayed and cried. I still had a life to live. Kids needed to be fed, school work needed to be done. I felt too afraid to leave my kids alone for any amount of time. I felt afraid to not have my home spotless and company ready. (which it never is!) I just wanted to go and stay in bed.

But no one is going to get all that documentation together FOR me. No one is going to feed my kids or get their {school} work-samples ready for the monthly meeting. I felt sick to my stomach and lost my appetite. My hands and feet, joints, have been hurting for weeks now and it got worse.

I fought and pushed through the feelings. My kids ate cold cereal, the sugary, sweetened, no nutritional value what-so-ever kind...and I let them. I got up out of bed and went to work out anyway. I did squats and lunges and jumps and planks and core holds, and it all felt harder and I sweated more than usual. Then I came home and sat on the couch, avoiding my bedroom to keep from crawling back into bed.  I smiled, posed for pictures, attended birthday parties and ate a lot of peanut M&M's. (don't hate!) I prayed, called others to pray, prayed more, cried and asked God to understand the prayers of my tears. It took a couple days but eventually I shook it off and was able to focus once again.

I need divine justice, as proven by the investigator's 'report', human justice is corrupt! I am trusting God in this. He is the only one who can help me-who will be reliable and faithful, who is ON my side! I know it will all work out.

I appreciate your prayers.