quotes from the article (linked above) are in italics
I love my grandchildren, but being a grandmother got added to my to-do list.
WOW! That's what children, grandchildren are now....just another notch on a To-DO list?
I wasn't a stay-at-home mom, and I can't be a stay-at-home-grandma either.
Can't or WON'T?
Inevitably, her daughter was angry and fed up, saying, "You make time for other people, but not for me."
BINGO! Let this be a warning to us NOW---TIME is REALLY what our kids want & need...& if neglected, resentment will be carried into adulthood.
D'Apolito said her daughter remembers "my mother, always home, the good old-fashioned grandmother. We never had to call. My daughter reminds me how nice that was."
DUH! they just don't care about what their own kids think---the writing is right there on the wall!
"I love those little kids and I do want to have a relationship with them," she said. "But I'm not willing to give up my writing or my traveling. I'll be the best grandmother I can from a distance."
That's it...she is NOT willing to be a grandma....basically to be loving. NOT WILLING.
"I tell them it's not important for me to come to their birthdays -- they don't even know I'm there. But I'll stop by and spend an hour or two when it's just them and me," she adds.
Did anyone else think this comment was INSANE?
the image of the grandmother should show her writing checks.
Ok if that's ALL they want to be valued as---a BANK?
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Ugh...this attitude...it's really appalling & I actually feel angry!
The entire article just reeks of ME, ME, ME...& basically that EVERYTHING else IS more important than their own children & grandchildren.
All I know is that *I* will NOT be this way. I've already told my dc that they BETTER make regular date nights w/ thier spouses JUST SO I can spend time w/ MY grands!
Sure, there are things I want to do 'when I grow up'...lol, but I figure it can still include my family & grands. kwim? I expect to take up quilting...& how nice would it be to have time to enjoy learning & teaching my grands someday too.
I mean I think it will be SO exciting to be a grand NOT a 'parent'...so much more freedom. I can sit & read & not worry about when & if my child learns to read...that will be their 'mom's' job. ;)
I'll just to get to sit & read & enjoy & send them home @ the end of the night.
These 'grandmothers' try to say that it's just that they want time for themselves & their H...NO, they want time for thier books, travel, & mostly WORK! good grief!
I have many friends who struggle w/ this same attitude within thier own families. It's disappointing. There's NO support anymore. But that brings me into a whole other topic...so I'll get off my soapbox....for now.
I'm sorry if someone finds my rant offensive, but I find the attitude of this article highly offensive & I can't overlook it or hide my feelings about it.
I am in your camp 100%! I am actually seeing the season in my life when grandparenting isn't that far away. I do not want my 18 yr. old to have kids now...but in some ways, it's exciting to know that it "could" be on the near horizon (say six or seven years away).
ReplyDeleteThe "me" thing makes me "sick". My kids have been fortunate to have many Grandparents and Great Grandparents and you know what, they have GREAT relationships with each of them. For that, I am grateful.