For the Momma Who's About to Lose Her Ish!

Freaks!

No judgment here momma. I'll raise a Hunger Games two fingered salute in solidarity to you. Take a deep breath, walk away, lock yourself in the bathroom--but take your phone so you can read this. 

Times get hard. Having a toddler can be hard. Having a teenager can be hard. Heck, getting out of bed and resisting the urge to go out in public in something other than pajama pants, can he heck-a-hard at times. This isn't every day life. But it's real life sometimes. like, when you're in school, your kids are in school, one or more of your kids have gotten the flu {the vomitrocious kind especially}, there is other extended family crisis, you're a solo-mom, or your 8 year old  has decided today is the day he is going to be his own person and refuse to do anything you ask him to do, ever. Or like it's one of those days that end in 'day'. 

Here are my 25 years of parenting suggestions that may or may not apply to you. Feel free to use the ones that do. 

Eliminate any thing you can for this season! It will NOT always be like this. Here are a few simple tips. HUGS!!!

1. Meals-is it work or relaxing for you? If it feels like more 'work': get ready made or one pot meals. Use paper plates and disposable utensils. Ditch the food guilt and feel proud that your kids are fed today. 

2. Take a walk or exercise everyday. Seriously, it will help your brain, emotions, heart and mental state. You can google it. It's true. I know you wish you could get to the gym, even if all you do is sit on your phone, in peace. Let the guilt, wishes and dreams go. This is the time to circle the wagons-we're not in the wild west or on the Oregon Trail but those of you who remember when that wasn't a board game--I think you get what I'm saying. 

3. When kids come home-drop the stuff and take a walk around the block. This really isn't a repeat of the previous suggestion, I promise. This time you *include* the freaks of your womb not try to escape from them.This will give everyone a chance to transition and reconnect.

4. Eliminate or minimize sugar intake. Consume lots of water and protein. Being hangry never helps and can seriously alter moods. I get it. We're all emotional eaters over here who would rather consume a sticky, fried donut than feel whatever we feel but--it won't help. Ok, well, it might for a minute, but not later. Trust me on this one. Step away from the sugar rush and eat a string cheese--ok dairy free, whatever. Just stick to the protein! 

5. 20 second minimum, hugs for each kid when they get home, after bath, before bed and any other time things are feeling tense. Hugs also help to reduce stress. Often it feels like the last thing we want to do is give a hug to our spawn behaving like twerps but they probably need it the most in that moment. Come on--you know it will help you too. It's like when mothers are suffering from Postpartum Depressions--doctors recommend they hold their baby more! The physical connection is great but counting to that 20 will give you a moment to breath and not do or say anything you will regret. It forces you to slow down, think and breath. You need oxygen. Duh. 

6. Smile. It tells your brain it feels positive. Really. Try it right now. Do it. Ok, now hold for 10...20 seconds. Well now it's just ridiculous so you have to laugh. But doesn't that feel better already? It's not full {fool?} proof, ya know? These are more like 'guidelines'. 

7.Touch your kids (tousle hair, pat on the back, tickle ear). Human touch helps lessen stress and maintain connection. Like the HUGS! 

8. Give yourself and your kids compliments. LOOK for positive things to say. It will help you stay focused on the goodness around you. Try to overlook negative behavior or responses as much as possible.

Life WILL get stressful. It happens. Expect it but be prepared. You will be able to handle it better if you are prepared, just like a fire drill! File this away in your brain, under life skills and crisis preparedness drills. We should really have those for aspiring parents. I'm not even joking.

You're ok momma. You are going to continue to be ok. You don't have to live life as normal, like everything is ok, when it's NOT. Life gets messy so why would we expect it to stay perfectly or even moderately organized? Be nice to yourself (oh! Tip #9?) It's ok if your kids wear mismatched socks, two days in a row, of the same non-pair. No one ever died of stinky feet.

Stay strong-You got this!