Friday, May 13, 2011

When a spouse makes a bad decision...

This particular post was inspired by a recent online conversation so it speaks from the wife's perspective, but I believe it can apply to either spouse. 

There may come a time within a marriage when either spouse makes a really bad, horrible choice or decision. It can be confusing and even tricky to know how to respond.

I am not sure about the idea of *just* trusting God to *provide* if your DH is making a BAD decision. I mean like DH over spends & God is going to provide an extra paycheck or something to cover it.

I tend to think more like: We just might ALL suffer for DH bad decision--if we can't afford it there is no guarantee God is going to just magically make us afford it. We might end up losing the car or something else, ruining our credit etc. However, I TRUST that GOD will use the bad decision, rather, to TEACH DH a lesson, on his own, w/o my help. wink

& I believe FAMILIES often pay consequences for DH (or DW if it was something she did) mistakes. BUT there is grace & mercy so that the families grow stronger in the end because of it.

I think Christian women need to be aware of this: men make mistakes--sometimes BIG ones--we need to be prepared to weather these storms & allow GOD to work in the hearts, minds & souls of our men, just as He works in OURS. A lesson in graciousness & mercy. How will we respond in the END?

Throw it @ them? Hold a grudge? Or stand beside them, pull up our boot straps & say: ok--here we are--let's work TOGETHER now to figure it out & clean up the mess. kwim?

I think that sends a better message of support & unconditional love--not smiling w/ approval @ things we clearly or strongly disagree w/ but BEING THERE when the time comes to manage the *consequences* w/ grace.

That is what it really means when you *commit* to marriage--you're not just committing to sunshine & flowery days.  You're committing to ups AND downs, highs AND lows. This goes for both parties. If you're thinking about marriage--what you really need to consider is IF you are willing to weather (& grow from) the storms and disappointments, just as much as your willing to enjoying the Spring times.

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