Friday, September 21, 2007

Kill him w/ kindness?

Do you think it will work? {sigh}

More police drama today...after yesterday & Wednesday were so peaceful! HA! (I have my suspicions as to WHY the sudden change in behavior)

I couldn't get all I needed from the house last night because the main room I was in, the light bulb is burned out..so it was too dark to see & get what I needed. I TM today asking when he will NOT be there (just like yesterday) & we make arrangements. He asks if he can take them to his parents house, I respond (same as usual) that I don't think that's a good idea. (since he threatened to take them away, I can't risk it)

ALL of a sudden he changes his mind & decides to be snarky & TM that I can ONLY come to the house ALONE! What? I remind him of my safety being a priority, blah blah blah. So then he decides he will stay, call his parents & the police, to escort me as I remove whatever it is I came for. Whatever. I TM him to tell his parents to bring the video camera too. sheesh!

After a few errands....I STILL TM him asking him if he had time for the ktbunch or what. (we were trying to make arrangements earlier before he 'lost' it). Ok, we make arrangements to meet @ a local park....THEN he decides to be snarky, again. Says he is bringing a witness. Ok fine, again I remind him to bring the video camera. {eyeroll, long sigh} Then he's telling me I have to meet him @ the police station for the 'exchange'. Are you kidding me? There is NO exchange....I am bringing the littles to play w/ their dad, I remain there & then they leave w/ me, like they came. kwim?

He demands I arrive @ such & such police station in 10 minutes! I respond, we agreed to the park & that is where we are going. I arrived, he was alone. {duh!} It was freezing, after 50 min I ask if we can go somewhere INdoors. *I* suggest Check-E-Cheese. ok fine.

I guess my new attitude is to be kind, polite & cool as a cucumber. I've realized, when he's getting 'high-drama' it's because he is 'losing control'. duh. He's always been a 'feeler' & I am a 'thinker'. It is serving me well in this situation. ;-)

He is trying to bully me & it's not going to work. Like a child, he gets mad when he doesn't get his way & starts 'acting up'. whatever.

I spoke to him as the children were getting in the car about not smoking in the home because the smell remains & since Ern has asthma...I didn't think it was a good idea. I spoke softly & politely. I think he was thrown off & even though he had attitude, he said ok. I also made brief chit-chat w/ him inside ChuckEcheese & let him know no one hates him @ my dad's house. He told the littles he would bring pizza to the house after we left.

He called & spoke sympathetically to let me know he had arrived w/ it. We went out to get it & he rushed to leave...I was trying to ask him his plans for tomorrow & when he wanted to see the kids & he turned around & snapped back W/ attitude: WHAT? I responded politely & just repeated myself...He snapped out: OK! & just kept walking. I don't know if he really heard, but whatever.

I couldn't help but break down & cry (again) as we left ChuckECheese. {another deep sigh}

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