Friday, September 21, 2007

Question of the Day?

Would *I* take 'him' back?....in a heartbeat (@ least today).

Most everyone is asking me this lately.

Let me explain what 'taking him back' really means.

It does NOT mean, if he came sobbing & begging, that I would say GREAT! & start moving me & the kids back into "the house". It means, I would allow him the opportunity to try & PROVE to us, w/ every waking breathe, for the rest of his life, that we are his #1 priority & he's sorry.

kwim?

He'd need to do tons of tangible things that go along w/ proving it...& yes, I do have a list started.

And it's easy for me to say yes when I know it is not something that I believe is ever going to happen anyway. kwim? That's how it is w/ hypothetical questions. He's not sorry.

I love this man, never stopped. When I took our vows, I truly meant for better or for worse. I am not embarrassed to admit that. You don't just turn off love because you are very angry. kwim? I still meant it, even more, when we renewed our vows 3 years ago, whether he did nor not, *I* did.

I put 15 years of myself & my life into this relationship. I built & rebuilt us a life & a family...I cannot give it up that easy. The least of my goals was to give my children a stable intact family....I would still like too.

I'm tired of people telling me I can 'do better', I will 'find someone else' OR that I 'deserve' to be treated better. Because, as a Christian, realistically---what do we ever deserve? Certainly not what we receive right? None is better or more deserving than the next. IMO

So there ya go. The answer is yes, you can stop asking now. ;-)

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